Bloody Good Bargains
Yikes, how bloody profeshnial is this, a bloody products page. Bloody hell. S’only a coupla T-shirts, but buy lots please cos being so mentally deranged by endless drug use and therefore entirely unemployable, this is how I put bread on the table (sometimes I have margerine too, but only on special occasions…) (and it’s better to use a plate really, or the table gets all messy after a few weeks).
Anthill Custom Cycles
Bit of a serious pose there H, I’ll have to make you smile for the next shot. But anyway, what you’re all really interested in is the T-shirt of course. Anthill Custom Cycles. The legendary and unforgettable shed that launched a thousand classic motorcycles utterly ruined with angle-grinders and big hammers. These are the grooviest shirts you’ll ever buy, instant street cred down your entire street, old men gawp, mothers gather up their children, floozies make eyes at you, crikey, it doesn’t get any better. Brand new and never even worn by anyone else at all, just £10.99 each. In M, L, XL or XXL and you can have black or black. Proper.
SORRY, SOLD OUT! Okay, here’s a good one. This is a design I stole off a 1919 French motorcycle company logo. They weren’t using it any more. So how wonderfully perverse is that to start with. Looks stunning when worn (er, which is why H is just holding it… We didn’t think this through, did we…?). Again a measly £9.99, M, L, XL and XXL, massive availability, and hipper than a hip thing in hipsters. Phew, must be time for breakfast now, should have bloody had it before I started this…
SORRY SOLD OUT – Just as groovy as the Original Anthill, only not the same (look, the bike’s facing the other way for a start) (and it’s a different bike) (and the lettering’s different and everything…). Other than that (and lots of other things), it’s the same – a piffling £9.99 in M, L, XL and XXL. So there.
How To Make Me Rich
Okay, if you feel inclined to help stop me starving, you can buy shirts in several wonderous ways.
Paypal is best, just send cost of shirt, plus £3.20 for P&P, to email@example.com
Or if you don’t trust electronica, a good old cheque made payable to odgie will do the job, snail mail it to c/o 19 Parkgate Drive, Leyland, PR25 1BU (stalkers and government officials please note, that’s not where I actually live).
Don’t forget to state which shirt you want, what size you want, and where I need to send it. And add the £3.20 for postage (or a fiver if it’s going abroad). All those bits are quite important really.
Right, I’ve been buggering about with this for ages, I’m off